1.19.2017

photo diary: eleutheromania

Words make me so curious. They can make or break people, they can hold a kingdom or start riots that could collapse the very same kingdom. But some words hold universes within their meanings. It's almost ironic how an arrangement of alphabets can be so so powerful that a thousand emotions, with all their glory, are wrapped inside it.

Eleutheromania is one such word that means an irresistible desire for freedom. 

I don't know what I was doing without this word before. Because it just hits home. Freedom means differently for different people. For some, it is hopping on a plane without a second thought yet for some, only stepping out of the house is the prime type of it. The only thing we all have in common is the desire to hold freedom in our palms so that it feels like a crumpled piece of paper, totally in control of the hand holding it.

When I think about freedom, it appears like a web of complex emotions; both the brightest and the darkest. It appears like something that could ruin you if it's gone out of balance. The relationship between balance and freedom is almost as delicate as the china tea set in my grandmother's cupboard that she wouldn't let us kids touch; for all of us knew how precious yet fragile it was.

For me, freedom is making decisions and standing by them even when it means seeing my sky shatter into million pieces and falling down on me with its pieces cutting my skin open, it means roaming around in my city's alleys, both the famous and nameless ones, it means knowing far too well where I am and where I want to be. Freedom is another name of a lifestyle I would love to lead.

here's a photoset that depicts eleutheromania better
Freedom is the only thing I know is truly mine. I keep it within the boundaries set for me, for losing the balance of it is disastrous. The idea of not being free enough to do things on my own is suffocating. And it feels like eleutheromania has affected me far too badly.

If you could describe freedom, how would you do that?
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