19 feat. Turquoise Hair

I turned 19 on 16th August 2016.

I have always thought of 19 as a difficult phase. It's exactly when you're in the middle of transiting to a (supposed) adult but the teen in you won't let go; a very difficult phase indeed. The evening before my birthday, I turned off my phone, struggling to keep it shut until next day so I wouldn't have to talk about the dilemma 19th year of life was bringing along.
It didn't take long before I turned it on again to check my Instagram notifications, cried my heart out in front of my twin sister, then went over to my friend's house to pick her up so we could have that 12 AM gosh-yerrrr-burrrthday moment.

I guess I will never stop worrying about the age that's coming, reminiscing about the ages that have gone, things that could have been done, things that should not have happened. The list of should have's and could have's are endless; the numbers I would have to live are going to be pretty limited. So I might as well forget that they exist.
I turned 19 and it didn't feel like anything. I didn't turn around in a halo to have an unexpected transformation. Fairy godmother didn't visit me with magical presents. I also didn't find a secret letter telling me about an ancient family secret to digging it up and realize my ancestors ruled a really cool city that I might inherit. A clock ticked and dragged me to the last teenage year.

After everything jumbling up in my mind, I am settling with reality. The reality is that 19 years of my life have gone and I have yet to do a lot of things. Things my mother would be proud of. Things that I can tell my grandchildren about. Out of everything I would tell them, one is totally going to be about my hair color history.
I have had dyed hair for almost three years now. Started from maroon-ish red to bright red, I just got a hair cut and dyed them turquoise for the big 19th chapter of life. My main inspiration was Kylie Jenner circa 2014 because

1) I love Kylie Jenner
2) turquoise short hair look so dope anyways

I hope my grandchildren would think they looked cool. Because I think they look cool.
Long story short, I am 19 years old with turquoise hair and a lot of gifts to open because apparently, some people were really happy that I am alive and breathing and made it this far so they bought me things. I really like people.

If you're wondering about birthday celebrations, my twin sister and I celebrated with our friends. Then we celebrated again on the weekend (because the 16 fell on a frickin' Tuesday) with our book club anniversary that's same as our birthday, then just today, a family gathering turned into another birthday party with legit cake and lots of small cousins around. Just as I told you, I really like people.

Last thing I really wanted to add to this I-am-so-19 post; it's a note to myself and probably to anyone who might need it: I hope you learn to be kinder than ever before. Because kindness is what mother talked about, kindness is what people will remember you for, and kindness is the only thing you would need to make your life easier I hope you learn to be kind.

How do you celebrate your birthday?
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